Self-esteem
Counselling & Psychotherapy for Self-esteem
The Impact of Self-Esteem on Mental Health
Self-esteem is based on our opinions and beliefs about ourselves and how much we value and perceive ourselves.
It is an indication of our self-worth and self-confidence. Experiencing low self-esteem can cause emotional suffering, leading to mental health problems such as anxiety and depression.
Signs of low self-esteem include:
- Focusing on negative things about yourself and being self-critical
- Ignoring your achievements and distrusting your own judgements
- Believing that others are better than you and that you are not good enough
- Doubting your abilities and skills
- Having difficulty accepting compliments
- Avoiding challenges for fear of failing
- Wanting to socially withdraw due to difficulty making friends
Low self-esteem: Talking about mental health
What can cause low self-esteem?
Low self-esteem can be caused by a multitude of factors that have happened in the past or is presently happening. For example, how we have been treated by others, the impact of life events, such as losing our job or feeling pressurised to meet unrealistic expectations. In response to such events our internal voice can become destructive towards ourselves.
All of us engage in ‘self-talk’, the ability to talk to ourselves in our minds as we process, or comment on what is happening around us. This is to help motivate us and keep us on track. However, our self-talk can become critical, punishing, shaming, judgmental and hurtful. This is a signal that our ‘inner-critic’ has taken over. We often become our own harshest critic, speaking to ourselves in ways we would never speak to our friends.
The problem with having a harsh inner-critic is that it triggers the ‘threat system’, which signals to the brain that we are under attack. The brain responds by releasing cortisol and other hormones that trigger the fight-flight response. Therefore, people who have a low self-esteem and consequently engage in self-criticism are at a high risk of stress, anxiety, and depression.
How Can Counselling & Psychotherapy Help?
- Through exploration, we can identify the cause of your low self-esteem and how it is detrimentally affecting you
- We can cultivate an approach of self-compassion towards yourself, which according to research is an extremely powerful antidote to the inner-critic. When we practice self-compassion, we are actually moving our sense of safety from the threat system to the ‘soothing system’ and our own care-giving and attachment system. This awakens our own ability to ‘self-soothe’ which is actually more productive than being self-critical. When we give ourselves compassion, we feel safe, emotionally balanced, and loved. This puts us on the best footing to not only be happy, but to also grow and to reach our goals.
- Counselling will help you to achieve higher levels of self-esteem and a renewed confidence in your capabilities and sense of self-worth. This will instigate you to become more assertive, for you believe that you are as valuable as others and that you are good enough
- It will support you in being able to celebrate your achievements and trusting in your own judgements
- By focusing on positive things about yourself, from others and yourself, will enable you to live a happier life. You will feel able to take on challenges, opposed to focusing on your fear of failing.
SELF-ESTEEM TREATMENT IN GUILDFORD:
Therapeutically, my treatment plan for anxiety will be tailored for you and your unique needs. This will incorporate Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT)and Integrative psychotherapy. The biggest step is acknowledging that you are struggling and require support. Reach out and arrange an initial 15-20 minutes consultation, so that we can collaboratively and comfortably work together towards your desired goal of increasing your self-esteem and your sense of self-worth.